Jesus !! I need my life back !!
Which life am i talking about ?? Well i am talking about those days when i was free.. could do what i want.. remember the school days when i used to come back home, dash off to play cricket.. in college when i used to sleep comfortably in the afternoons... i so miss those days :( . Well maybe because the life today am living is not what i want??
I am turning 25 this August. God , suddenly things seem so tough.. life suddenly has become so complicated, or i chose to make it. Everynight on my bed, a lot of questions come to my mind.. what am i doing ? is this what i want to be? what was my aim in life..? did i ever have one?? And will i ever achieve them... the best part is i dont get any answers to these questions.. but the good part is i somehow manage to sleep..
Well,the only solace is that am not alone.. whenever i meet my group of friends.. this topic comes inevitable.. a typical conversation would seem like this
Scene -1
********
The situation here is me meeting my friends R,J,V
Arjun : hey R, howz ur work going man?
R : Dont ask man, i am fed up of this F%^&^*g software work. i am just not doing what i want.
J: Same thing here man. i want to do something which interests me.not this coding
Arjun : Hmmm... then what do u guys want to do?
R : i want to do something thats close to heart, something that will appeal to my heart.
J : yeah man he is right.Me too
Arjun : Alright , but u guys still havent answered my question.but what do u guys want to do??
V: am giving CAT and GMAT this year.
R and J : yeah me too.
********************** Conversation ends ******************
What does one make out of this conversation??? A whole generation of discontent people who just dont know what they want to do ??? Atleast do they know what they dont want to do ? Thats even more important as it would remove a lot of choices. Ok atleast my friend 'R' is sure he doesnt want to do coding. Can i say the same about myself..? i dont know... what the hell.. yeah i dont mind coding.. but it doesnt fascinate me...
Scene-2
********
Arjun, R and V, inspired by their "out of the box" thinking decide to do something on their own.So they sit together to think
R : guys am ready to quit my job, i have enuff money to survive for 6 months wihtout a job.
Arjun : Hmmmm.......
V: no yaar i cannot quit my job. But i can give my time for whatveer we do after Office.
Arjun : yeah me too.
R : Ok. so lets get started.
(over the next n months and m days they struggle it out, until they loose steam. so after the debacle , they meet again)
Scene-3
********
R : Man, we have come to a stand still.Where are u guyz?
Arjun:Hmm..ummm... i think we are not qualified enuff to do it.
V : Yeah, even i too think so.
R : Bull shit, its all in the mind. we are just too F*****g scared.
********* conversation closed *********
Thinking of that, scared of what????? Hmm.. well scared of lot of things man...
Scared of loosing the "comfort zone" , the zone whihc we have built over the years of our school, college and job life. The same zome which allows to curse our job, yet do it and allows us to squander money on weekends.. and yet atleast be safe that we have a "safe job" in our hands. I cant blame myself fully for this trait in me or anyone else. thats how the average middle class indian has been brought up.
Parents : beta, study well be an engineer, doctor or if nothing what desitny gives you. get married and have a nice family and be obedient in ur duties.
Child : Yes (and he spends his rest of the life in doing that only) and thus builds this comfort zone.
Todays youth has learnt an easy way to handle with these situation Escapism. if job sucks.. go for an MBA. Arey, but are u going for something u want??? wont u crib 2 yrs from now??? Well the money's good, so why to complain? many might say.... true... but money is not everything(is money the only thing??? . i dont know that either) .This brings me to an interesting thinking, do we finally give up running for a long time?? Is it when we understand the mysticism of life -- life's like that, the day u understand half our problems vanish. Maybe marriage is the best step towards this. One settles in and then maybe he doesnt think much. even if he does, he has so mayn other issues which will always eclipse it.
So what the hell are we supposed to do ???? Ask me , i dunno.. there is a word for this which is making circles now a days..."Quarterly Life Crisis", probably coined by some smart ass. Atleast i hide myself for the time being behind this word.But not for long. What am i going to do???
Hmm.. umm... Well i am not going to wait for my 25th Birthday to decide that.. because i might never come upon a conclusion....well as my friend 'R' puts in its better to take life as it comes.. but yeah never settle for what you dont like, even if it doesnt make u richie rich !
after all you cannot have the cake and eat it too!! can u ???
Note: if ure not in a crisis, then either u havent turned 25 or maybe ure just plain lucky or maybe maybe 'NEO'
current status of the characters in this blog
*********************************************
R:he quit his job,took up some enterprenuership for 6 months, quit and again back to software job.
J: well he is still in the process of juggling between his job and study plans.
V: he is gonna get married, so i guess he is no longer in our league... the league of extraordinary fools..
Arjun : Hmm... um..... what to say??? he still continues his battle as to what is wrong and right for him.... maybe 26 might be lucky for him....
